Let’s take a look at what one of my mentor’s, Marie Forleo, likes to call, RHH.
RICH. HAPPY. HOT.
These are three of the biggies of what everyone wants. Who doesn’t want to have unlimited abundance and feel and look their best? I do! It’s all possible with loving yourself. Let’s take a look at each topic individually.
Yes, I mean financially. However, I also mean experiencing an inner richness of being connected to spirit. So many people live their life in a state of poverty mentality. Some of you are spiritual people and you think that having money is “bad.” If there are starving people in Africa, then you should be starving too. But, put it this way, if they’re starving and your starving, then how are you going to be able to help them? How would you be able to go to Africa to bring over food or help teach about sustainable agriculture? How would you pay for your flight over there? Being rich is not bad. Money is not bad. It’s your relationship to money that could be problematic. Not money itself. If you are rich and you have a healthy relationship to money, then rock on! If you are rich, and you’ve screwed a bunch of people over to get that way, then I’d take a look at that.
Your self-worth is reflected back to you in your bank account. No, it’s not the economic recession of ’08, or that 100 people have applied for the same position that you’ve applied for, or that you’ve had a case of bad luck. It’s your self-worth. For years, I’ve struggled with money. I would blame it on external situations, such as I could never find the right job or that my employer wasn’t paying me what I deserved or that I didn’t know how to properly budget and manage money. All of that was a bunch of BS. That was a story that I had on loop in the record player of my mind. What was underneath the story was that I did not value myself. My self-worth was low. We teach people how to treat us based on how we treat us.
I thought I was no good, so I would attract external situations in my financial life to affirm that to me over and over again. I worked for someone for 2.5 years and was underpaid the whole time. At the time I thought there were no other jobs available and I just had to suck it up being underpaid. However, now I realize it’s because I didn’t value myself enough to stand up for myself and ask for what I properly deserved. If I had valued myself, I would have asked for the compensation that was equal to my skill set. My employer would have either given me a raise, or she would said that she couldn’t do that. If she couldn’t, another job which could pay me what I was asking for would have magically opened up. When you affirm your value to yourself, the universe aligns itself energetically to match you and situations seemingly magically open up and become available to you. It’s all about loving yourself. If you want to be rich, start with connecting with your own inner richness of spirit, start by loving yourself more, and watch those dollar signs add up in your bank account.
Who are you to be happy, giddy and stoked to be alive every minute of every day? Well, who are you not to be? Sure, we all have challenging moments and can feel crappy, but it’s my intention to feel happy more times than not. When you truly love who you are, then you can’t help but be happy. It naturally oozes out of you. I saw a friend that I hadn’t seen in three years this past weekend and he said to me, “Wow, you look incredible, you’re just glowing!” He said it to me several times over the course of our hang-out. I was still the same old me, but the difference was that I am feeling happier than I’ve ever felt before. Like the glow from a lantern, it was naturally emanating out of me. When you truly love yourself, it doesn’t matter what’s happening externally around you. Nothing can rock your boat, because you’re secure, like an anchor in a storm.
For example, I wrote an article this past week that I thought was absolutely amazing. I thought it was going to be a feature piece for this particular online journal that I had submitted it to. I received an email back from them saying that my piece had been rejected. “Whaaat, you’re crazy for not publishing my piece,” my ego exclaimed! That reaction took up about a minute of my mental space, and then I was able to quickly re-center. I realized it’s okay that they couldn’t see the value in my article, and that another publishing company will. There’s nothing wrong with them, and there’s nothing wrong with me. We just clearly weren’t an advantageous fit for one another.
Since I feel confident and happy about who I am, it doesn’t matter what the external world will bring me because I am secure in knowing that I am good enough. Ironically, knowing that I’m good enough will bring about more comfortable external situations. I clearly needed to learn a lesson about being rejected, but that doesn’t mean that I’m a bad person. It was just a lesson in the school of life. I know I will continue to learn lessons, and so will you, because we are not perfect. However, when you are happy with yourself from the inside out and you love yourself, you can bat 1000 at any curve ball that life throws you. We are perfect in our imperfections. If we can accept that and truly love ourselves, then we will experience authentic happiness. If we can do this, then our happiness won’t be dependent upon on what our spouse did or didn’t say to us or whether we wake up with a huge zit on our face in the morning or whether we’re 40 pounds overweight. Our happiness will be dependent upon ourselves. We are all a beautiful creation of the universe. The same forces that created the cosmos created you and I. Tap into that power. For me, that’s a good enough reason to be happy.
I lived most of my adolescent years thinking I was super ugly. Since I believed that, I attracted people and situations into my life which would reflect that back to me. I remember one time in high school a boy from school was making fun of me and said to me, “you’re ugly, your face is shaped like banana.” I was absolutely mortified. I wanted to put a bag over my head as a service to the world. I carried this belief with me for a long time. However, in my twenties, little by little I started to think that maybe I wasn’t that bad after all. The more I started doing spiritual work, the more I started to fall in love with myself. I started to be able to see my beauty in a whole new way. My beauty started to get reflected back to me. I remember one day when I was walking through my college campus, someone approached me, “Have you ever done modeling? I’m an agent for Lou Pearlman’s company (the developer of N’Sync) and I want you to stop in our office.” I realized maybe I wasn’t ugly after all.
A few weeks ago I was at a gathering with some friends and we were discussing the Fibonacci sequence. The Fibonacci sequence is a numerical sequence where the higher up in the sequence you go, the closer you approach the golden ratio (a + b is to a as a is to b). This is the formula for which all of life is created from. The closer something is to that formula, the more “perfect” it’s considered. After I left the gathering, I was curious about the golden ratio so I researched it further. I found a website that told you how to take the measurements of your face to see how close to the ratio you are. I took my facial measurements (length times width in certain areas). The golden rule says that a “perfect” face is 1.6 times longer than it is wide. To my complete surprise, my face had the exact measurements of the golden ratio. I was absolutely flabbergasted.
This is a perfect example of how our thoughts control how we view ourselves. Here I was with a face which was considered “perfect,” but yet I lived my life thinking my face was so ugly, especially because someone told me it was shaped like a banana. You can imagine how learning this has flipped my world. You are what you think you are. If you think you’re ugly, then you will be, and you’ll find people who will think so too and tell you that (even if you have the “perfect” face.) If you think you’re beautiful or handsome, you will be and you’ll find people who will think so too and tell you that. The key in all of this? Loving yourself, of course. Because no matter what your facial measurements are, or any of your measurements, if you love yourself, it’s going to shine through and you will appear absolutely stunning. Everyone is gorgeous in their own way. We all possess unique qualities. Get in touch with yours and relish them. Allow your good looks to shine through.
Love yourself. Be rich, happy and hot.
I love hearing from you in the comments section below. What are some of your limiting beliefs that you have around being rich, happy or hot? What are some new beliefs that you are willing to replace with your old ones with?
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